Therapy is Fun
by BewilderedLoca
Summary: What happens when you mix in three men in a room in attempts of therapy? Chaos... well, I tried. Happy Birthday Kiki!


BewilderedLoca

Disclaimer: Look, do we really have to go over this? I don't own them. Simple as that. The only thing I do own is the Wolverine and Bryan from Tekken action figures u-u

InuYasha: LOL, Thank god.

Sesshoumaru *sighes* read the special note. *points*

Bankotsu: Tch, I can do it 8D *reads* '_This is is a little something special for InuGrrrl. Happy Birthday and hope you have many more. Much Love 3_'.

InuYasha: Hey, what are the chances of her even reading this?

Bankotsu: Don't say that -.-

Oh don't worry, that's why I hate him but anyhoo, enough of that. I hope you guys enjoy the fic ;D

'**Therapy is Fun**'

=====xXx=====

"This is stupid." InuYasha grumbled.

"Do you want my advice?" Sesshoumaru asked.

"Yes." He grumbled once again.

"Then shut up and play with it already." Sesshoumaru glared.

"Whyyy?" he whined.

"Why not? It's fun." Bankotsu chided in.

"Bankotsu shut up, InuYasha play with it." Sesshoumaru glared.

"I'm scared, it belongs to you."

"So?"

"I might catch a disease." InuYasha snickered.

"I don't see why not, the hair's pretty smooth and clean" Bankotsu stated.

"Bankotsu stop touching it. InuYasha's the only one allowed to play with it." Sesshoumaru said pushing his mischievous hands away.

"What makes him so special?" Bankotsu frowned.

Sesshoumaru paused, "My vodka stash is at risk here. Now stop being a baby and play with me already."

"You drink vodka?" Bankotsu wondered.

"Yes, now shut up." Sesshoumaru bluntly explained.

"But I don't wanna play."

"I wanna play!" Bankotsu pouted. "Let's play a drinking game!"

"No."

"Awww," Bankotsu frowned, "crush my dreams why doncha?"

Sesshoumaru ignored him, "Sheesh, who has your panties in twist?"

"Alright! If I do it, will you leave me alone?"

"Depends how good you are with it." Sesshoumaru groaned while Bankotsu snickered.

"If you suck at it, you'll be pretty unsuccessful in your sex life."

"Oh, it's already destroyed." Sesshoumaru commented.

"Ouch." Bankotsu cringed.

"Shut up!" InuYasha snapped.

"Hey look he's touching it!" Bankotsu pointed out.

"Finally…. Stop looking at it like that."

"I can't help it! I haven't touched none of these things in like… ever."

"Not even when the girls leave?" Bankotsu asked.

"Nah." InuYasha shook his head.

"Pssh, weenie."

"Shut up… So now what?" InuYasha blinked, "I'm touching it."

"Now pretend I'm Kagome."

"Eww, why?"

"Bankotsu shut up."

"Yeah eww, why?"

"InuYasha just do it."

"This doesn't feel right."

"Oh it won't be so bad."

"Mhmm, sure." InuYasha nodded before rolling his eyes. "Couldn't we do this in a room or something?"

"Oh no. The wolf is in the room, going through similar punishment and therapy… just like you."

"Ooh? With who?" Bankotsu asked.

"Naraku and Kikyou."

"Are you serious? Those three in a room? Alone?"

"Mhmm, Naraku has Kouga playing with his… why are you staring at me like that?" Sesshoumaru blinked.

"Why are you grinning like that?"

"I'm just being sarcastic." Sesshoumaru blinked.

"No not you. Bankotsu."

"Oh… well…. I dunno." He shrugged. "I just like the feel of it."

"You realize, you're taking advantage of me, right?" InuYasha protested.

"And you realize I don't care." Sesshoumaru gave him a look.

"I care…"

"Thank you Bankotsu."

"-About me videotaping this!" Bankotsu grinned. "Do you have any idea how much this video will profit!?"

"HEY!"

"Bankotsu put that away."

"The fangirls deserve to know!"

"Your death sentence, if you don't stop." Sesshoumaru glared. "Besides, it's a delicate time for InuYasha."

"Why is that?" Sesshoumaru shrugged. "Thank you Sesshoumaru." InuYasha rolled his eyes.

"Hey, I mean, I could just ignore you…"

"Alright alright, fine." InuYasha groaned. "Can't believe, I'm doing this… especially with you!"

"I can just ignore you." Sesshoumaru mocked.

"Alright, fine… just don't expect too much."

"Likewise."

InuYasha sighed before he lifted the Ken doll, "Hey Kagome! Wanna go for ride?"

"Sure InuYasha! I'd love too!" Sesshoumaru said in a feminine voice while holding the Barbie doll. "Where are you gonna like, take me?"

"Uhhh… to the mall?" InuYasha guessed.

"That'd be great!" 'Kagome' said.

"Can I drive the car atleast?" InuYasha said, pointing at the pink convertible.

"Tch, no. That's Barbie's car." Sesshoumaru scoffed while Bankotsu placed 'Kikyou' in the driver's seat.

"I thought Barbie was 'Kagome'." InuYasha asked.

"She is." Sesshoumaru groaned.

"Then why is 'Kikyou' in 'Kagome's' car?" InuYasha asked.

"Because it was under her name." Bankotsu whistled while motioning car. "Uh oh, Highway patrol." He stopped the convertible in front of a G.I Joe jeeps.

"Then who's that?" InuYasha pointed.

"Oh this here is Kikyou." Bankotsu said while holding up the brunette doll while holding the Wolverine and Bryan action figures.

"How come Kagome's the blonde and Kikyou's the brunette?"

"Because Kagome's the ditz and Kikyou just fades into the background."

"Then who's them?" He pointed at the Bryan and Wolverine figures.

"Oh, Renkotsu and Suikotsu?" Bankotsu sheepishly shrugged.

"And I could be someone other than Ken… Why?"

"Could you not complain for once? Just once?" Sesshoumaru pinched the spot between his eyes.

"Wouldn't be me."

"He has a point."

"Shut up Bankotsu."

"Why is everyone telling me to shut up? I didn't do anything."

Both brothers ignored him, "Oh how fetch guys. How fetch."

"I wanted to be Superman." InuYasha grumbled.

"Well you're Ken."

"Then who are you?"

"Me?" InuYasha nodded.

"God. Now let's pay attention." Sesshoumaru lifted 'Kagome' again.

"Oh no, not a ticket!" Bankotsu said in the background. "I just got paid yesterday!"

"Doing what, young m'am?" 'Renkotsu' said gruffly.

"Throwing make up on models and make them look like Q-tips!" 'Kikyou' defended herself.

'Suikotsu' laughed, "You made me laugh. No ticket for you m'am" he and 'Renkotsu' burned fake rubber off and left 'Kikyou' by herself.

"So can I drive?" InuYasha asked again.

"No. It's… 'Kagome's' car." Sesshoumaru frowned.

InuYasha scoffed, "The hell it is."

"What was that?" 'Kagome' snapped.

InuYasha groaned, "I can't do this." He admitted.

"Sure you can." Sesshoumaru glared. "Stop whining."

"Uh oh, we're running into InuYasha 'dork' territory." Bankotsu went off as 'Miroku' and 'Sango' came up to 'Kikyou's' convertible. "Wonder what'll happen."

"Just let me drive the car Kagome." InuYasha frowned as 'Kagome' scoffed.

"Drive what? I don't have a car anymore!" she lifted up her 'arms'.

"Alright, we have to call the cops!" Bankotsu gasped as 'Kikyou' sped off. "She gone crazy!" he yelled as 'Miroku' and 'Sango' laid there, with their bodies eviscerated.

InuYasha and Sesshoumaru stopped playing and looked over at Bankotsu act out further, "Kikyou's gone nuts!" he narrated as she ran over numerous other people. "First Miroku and Sango, now Shippou, Rin and Kouga are getting the next bulls eye!"

"…Sesshoumaru?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm scared." InuYasha admitted while watching Bankotsu have fun with himself.

"I'm just starting to worry about him now." Sesshoumaru said.

"Someone call the cops! The Ambulance! The Doctor!" Bankotsu panicked, oblivious to the others staring at him with anxious wonder.

"Should we get someone?" InuYasha looked over.

"Probably." Sesshoumaru watched Bankotsu play into his own world, oblivious to someone entering the room and groaning.

"What the hell!? I leave him here with you for an hour and look what happened!" Kagura groaned.

"Hey, I thought he'd behaved." Sesshoumaru glared. "Like YOU said he WOULD."

"No, I said flashed twinkies in front of him and he'll behave." Kagura corrected him.

"Uhm, just WHY do you think he's like this? I did just that and look!" He pointed out the two boxes of twinkies.

"Why'd you give him two boxes of twinkies?"

"Me _give_ him?" Sesshoumaru bristled, "He attacked me!"

"For God's sake, You were voted one of the most powerful anime characters! Where the hell is your pride!"

"Don't question my pride!" Sesshoumaru growled. "And where's my vodka! I know it was you!"

"Tch, they're so out of here man." Kagura shrugged as Sesshoumaru twitched.

"Oh no! Kanna RUN!" Bankotsu shouted as he ran around the hallway bumping the car into walls and running over random unsuspected pedestrians.

InuYasha stood quiet and snuck out the room while Sesshoumaru and Kagura were having a heated argument.

"DID SO!" Sesshoumaru snapped.

"DID NOT!" Kagura shouted.

"DID SO!"

"DID NOT!"

"Kikyou, I'd stop if I were you… wait." Bankotsu paused, "I'm YOUR God. You stop when I say so!" he stopped the car and looked over when he noticed Kagura.

"Oh and one more thing, BACARDI ISN'T THAT GREAT! IT'S WEAK!" Kagura stuck her tongue out.

"I KNOW ITS NOT! ITS GREAT FOR GETTING WOMEN KNOCKED UP!" Sesshoumaru growled, "But for you, YOU'RE AN EXCEPTION!"

"WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSE TO MEAN!?"

"Kagura?" Bankotsu nervously fidgeted.

She ignored him, "I MEAN YOURE THAT TYPE OF BURLY GIRL NO CIVIL MAN WOULD WANT!"

"Kagura?"

"Just primitives APES!" Sesshoumaru snapped.

"TAKE THAT BACK!"

"Kagura!"

"Don't need to. ITS ALREADY OUT THERE!"

"KAGURA!"

"WHAT?!" she snapped.

"Don't move." Bankotsu motioned her to stay.

"Why not?" she asked, still miffed.

"Because you'll hurt yourself."

"Oh please," she hoisted her hands at her hips and turned sideways, "-the day I listen to you is when I… OWWW!!"

"I told you." Bankotsu drawled.

"What is the hell is this!" she snarled while plucking the green plastic G.I Joe soldiers off her feet's and revealed several blood drops where the rifle stabbed through.

"You're bleeding!" Bankotsu pointed out.

"_Nooo_, really?" Kagura groaned while she shrugged the pain off and put her feet back in the ground.

"Ewww…" Sesshoumaru scooted away.

"Oh please." Kagura rolled her eyes, "you're an assassin for God's sake."

"Yeah but that's just gross." Sesshoumaru scrunched his nose. "Atleast I WASH my hands."

"Oh, so this is another snap huh?" Kagura growled.

Sesshoumaru ignored her and looked over, "Hey, where'd InuYasha go?"

Suddenly there was a two horrified screams that shattered in the inn. "What's that?" Kagura asked.

"If I'm lucky, it's Death." Sesshoumaru grumbled.

"Aww don't say that." Bankotsu frowned.

InuYasha screamed and barged through the door, shutting and locking it the instant he was safe. "What's wrong?"

"Kouga. That's what wrong." He panted. "He's on the fritz."

"Why?" Bankotsu wondered aloud.

"Apparently, he snapped when Naraku tried to use MyScene dolls on him." Kagura shrugged.

"It's worse. He used Bratz dolls." Everyone in the room shuddered. "He didn't like the idea so much and some other things were thrown in there but I don't want to get into further details…"

**"SOMEBODY GET ME A GUN AND I MEAN IT THIS TIME!!"** they heard him yell from the other side. **"NARAKU JUST YOU WAIT UNTIL I FIND YOU!"  
**  
"Sucks Ayame left for her spa date today." Kagura shrugged before looking over. "What's all this?"

"Spa date you say?" Sesshoumaru asked, trying to avoid explaining the dolls purpose.

"Mhmm, now why is there Barbie dolls here?"

"He says it's 'Love therapy' but I think otherwise." Bankotsu shrugged.

Kagura snickered, "'Love therapy', Oh God your ideas suck."

"And what'd you think be better?"

"Tch, invest in some better dolls." Kagura scoffed while picking up the Barbie and Ken doll. "You have the right idea though. They're a match."

InuYasha scowled, "Awww, I meant it as a compliment."

"Whatever." He drawled while Kagura left the room, came back, kicked the remaining G.I Joes away and sat down.

"What are you doing?" Sesshoumaru asked. "And what are those?"

"Better dolls." Kagura said lifting up the miniature version of 'InuYasha' and 'Kagome'.

"Those look like voodoo dolls to me." Bankotsu noted.

"That's because they ARE." She grinned while InuYasha and Sesshoumaru stared at her with anxious wonder.

"I have more." She blinked, oblivious to them scooting away from her.

"I wanna see!" Bankotsu grinned. "Do you have one of me?"

Kagura gave him a flat look, "Do I _ever_."

"Crap, the doors jammed." InuYasha frowned while he tried to open the door. "We're locked in."

"Thanks genius. Took me awhile to figure THAT out." Sesshoumaru shrugged before going back to the circle. "Might've as well stay here and watch her poke you with needles."

"Hey!"

"Whoa, I look hot." Bankotsu grinned staring at his doll, despite the needles jammed up his ass and chest.

"Stunning." Sesshoumaru blankly said.

"Yeah." Kagura ignored them and got into it with the voodoo replicas.

Sesshoumaru held one up, "Do they work?"

"Yes… for some reason, not for Bankotsu." She murmured.

"Oh, alright." Sesshoumaru said while he picked up a 'Jaken' doll and stabbed him with numerously needles, mercilessness.

"Kagura, I'm wounded," Bankotsu pouted, "Come on Kag. You know it's me, you really love!"

"What part of 'Stay away from me you little creep or you are going to die,' did you not understand?" Kagura snapped.

"That's not what your eyes say," Bankotsu smiled. "You love me! Just admit it!"

"Screw off." She scoffed.

"Maybe I should get a tattoo, not a permanent one, but one of those nice henna jobs would be very stylish. I'll proudly proclaim my love of the week." He lifted up his shirt. "Maybe here, or on my arm or maybe…" He wiggled his bottom.

"Please no." Sesshoumaru groaned while InuYasha crawled back and took a 'Kouga' doll. He stared at it for awhile of speculating the details. "This must've been time consuming."

"Yes, but it paid off in the end."

Bankotsu opened his pants and saw his doll's appendage. "Hey, you added a penis!" he frowned, "Mines is too small though… should make it bigger."

"I should cut it off and see you writhe in pain." Kagura hissed.

"And that would turn you on wouldn't it?" He grinned.

Kagura groaned and snatch his doll, "Ooh baby, who knew you'd like it rough."

InuYasha blinked and started poking needles on Kouga's legs and limbs. Just then, **"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"**

InuYasha snickered while Sesshoumaru was oblivious tormenting his 'Jaken' doll and Kagura strangling Bankotsu.

Naraku then barged in from the door at the other side of the room. "That wolf's lost it!"

"How'd you get in here?" InuYasha looked up, frowning.

"There was a secret door." Kagura blinked and pointed at door plane. "How couldn't you see it?

"You mean I could've left here a long time ago?" InuYasha asked incredously.

"Pretty much, How else do you think I got these?" she said holding up dolls.

"What'd I tell you about those dolls?" Naraku glared.

"Noooothing." Kagura hid behind her back, looking around innocently.

"Give them." He said reaching his hand out.

"No." Kagura held them close, "I worked hard on them!"

"Don't backtalk me." Naraku growled.

"I'll let Kouga in," Kagura moved near the door.

"You wouldn't." Naraku doubted.

"Try me," she mocked, opening the door.

"Kagura don't you dare!" he blanched when he saw the eccentric wolf standing by the door. "Oh no…"

"Hey there sonny," Kouga grinned, imitating Heath Ledger's Joker while holding up a revved up chainsaw. "Let's put a smile on that face."

"NOOOOOO!!!" Naraku screamed before running around the room, mainly away from the chainsaw.

Sesshoumaru and Kagura backed away while Bankotsu rushed over and opened the door. Naraku ran straight out and Kouga was hot on his tail. "AHHHHHHHHHH!"

**"SOMEONE MAKE HIM STOP!! AGHHH!" **they heard Naraku yell.

"Sounds like he's in trouble." Bankotsu peeped out the door.

"He has a point." Sesshoumaru shrugged, "I knew thee well." He mocked saluted.

**"NO! NOO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"** Naraku screeched while the chainsaw was heard. Everyone in the room cringed.

"Do you think he's dead?" Sesshoumaru asked while Kagura shrugged.

"I don't know, let's go see Bankotsu." Kagura said before dragging him, the same direction Naraku and Kouga ran through.

"InuYasha, you coming?" Sesshoumaru asked before leaving.

"Not right now Sesshoumaru." InuYasha shooed away, "I'm still trying to figure out what to wear for our date to the mall!"


End file.
